One Liner Quotes - Page 2

• Now that the war is winding down, I want to say I do appreciate you fellows hanging around here - just for me.

  Bob Hope

  War, Appreciate, Want

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• I've got to watch myself these days. It's too exciting watching anyone else.

  Bob Hope

  Watches, One Line, These Days

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• Lots of travel, away from home.

  Bob Hope

  Home, One Line, Away From Home

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• A very, very religious man. Every time I eat a peanut, I feel immortal.

  Bob Hope

  Religious, Men, One Line

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• It flies so high, I swear I heard the organs playing.

  Bob Hope

  One Line, Heard, Organs

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• I have this terrific make-up man. But he's expensive. I have to bring him in from Lourdes.

  Bob Hope

  Men, One Line, Lourdes

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• Please don't stand up on my account.

  Bob Hope

  One Line, Please, Accounts

  "He was big, and boy was he clever" by William Cook, www.theguardian.com. September 10, 2003.

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• He was bare chested and in good trim. I said that just looking at him I knew there would always be an England

  Bob Hope

  One Line, England, Said

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• Seventy years of ad-lib material, and I am speechless.

  Bob Hope

  Years, One Line, Speechless

  Bob Hope (2004). “Bob Hope”, Hyperion

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• Eisenhower admitted that the budget can't be balanced and McCarthy said the communists are taking over. You don't know what to worry about these days - whether the country will be overthrown or overdrawn.

  Bob Hope

  Country, Worry, Over You

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• If horses had controlled investment decisions, there would have been no auto industry.

  Warren Buffett

  Horse, Decision, One Line

  "One of the best things about Warren Buffett is that he's not afraid to let things die" by Joshua Brown, www.businessinsider.com. March 02, 2015.

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• He must never forget Charlie's plea: Tell me where I'm going to die, so I'll never go there.

  Warren Buffett

  One Line, Never Forget, Charlie

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• I was an only child. I did have kind of like a lonely existence.

  Robin Williams

  Lonely, Children, Only Child

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• I became a specialist at comedic one-liners.

  Lauren Hutton

  Comedic, Specialists

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• Stand-up is the place where you can do things that you could never do in public.

  Robin Williams

  One Line, Can Do

  "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• Writing books isn't a drastic departure from writing for the stage. I've always written in the long format, five, eight, 10-minute pieces rather than one-liners, so since writing books, the process hasn't changed much. A piece in my live routine can end up as part of one of my HBO specials, and it can also end up in one of the books.

  George Carlin

  Book, Writing, Eight

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• I see the Beatles have arrived from England. They were 40 pounds overweight - and that was just their hair.

  Bob Hope

  Hair, One Line, England

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• Be happy you guys. Be proud! You know what you are: you're God's frozen people.

  Bob Hope

  People, Guy, Frozen

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• My folks were English. They were too poor to be British. I still have a bit of British in me. In fact, my blood type is solid marmalade.

  Bob Hope

  Blood, One Line, Facts

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• The last time I played golf with President Ford he hit a birdie. And an eagle, a moose, an elk, an aardvark...

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Eagles, President

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• Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.

  Bob Hope

  Careers, Dying, One Line

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• A skunk is better company than a person who prides himself on being 'frank'.

  Robert A. Heinlein

  Clever, Pride, Company

  Robert A. Heinlein (1987). “Time Enough for Love”, p.327, Penguin

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• Zsa Zsa Gabor got married as a one-off, and it was so successful she turned it into a series.

  Bob Hope

  Successful, Funny Marriage, Married

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• Lord, thy one-liners are as good as thy tricks. Thou art indeed an all-round family entertainer.

  Rowan Atkinson

  Art, Lord, Tricks

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• People that do "bits" and "jokes" or "one-liners" are going by the wayside.

  Jay Mohr

  People, Jokes, Bits

  Source: underthegunreview.net

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