I'm going to win so much money this year, my caddie will make the top twenty money-winners list.
No one who ever had lessons would have a swing like mine.
One of the most fascinating things about golf is how it reflects the cycle of life. No matter what you shoot - the next day you have to go back to the first tee and begin all over again and make yourself into something.
I have found the game to be, in all factualness, a universal language wherever I traveled at home or abroad.
Everybody can see that my swing is homegrown. That means everybody has a chance to do it.
Baffling late-life discovery: Golfers wear those awful clothes on purpose.
Golf gives you an insight into human nature, your own as well as your opponent's.
The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil.
The best architects feel it to be their duty to make the path to the hole as free as possible from annoying difficulties for the less skillful golfers, while at the same time presenting to the scratch players a route calling for the best shots at their command.
A hole in one is amazing when you think of the different universes this white mass of molecules has to pass through on its way to the hole.
Golf is not, on the whole, a game for realists. By its exactitudes of measurements it invites the attention of perfectionists.
One thing about golf is you don't know why you play bad and why you play good.
Golf isn't like other sports where you can take a player out if he's having a bad day. You have to play the whole game.
I was asked by a golfer how to lower his scores. I replied start playing 9 holes instead of 18. I worked for me, it cut my scores in half.
The trouble that most of us find with the modern matched sets of clubs is that they don't really seem to know any more about the game than the old ones did.
Golf camaraderie, like that of astronauts and Antarctic explorers, is based on a common experience of transcendence; fat or thin, scratch or duffer, we have been somerwhere together where non-golfers never go.
I hasten to say to snobs from the Surrey pine-and-sand country that no invention since the corn plaster or the electric toothbrush has brought greater balm to the extremities of the senior golfer than the golfmobile, a word that will have to do for want of a better.
[Golfers] are a special kind of moral realist who nips the normal romantic and idealistic yearnings in the bud by proving once or twice a week that life is unconquerable but endurable.
I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced.
The golf swing is like a suitcase into which we are trying to pack one too many things.
When I putt, my emotions collide like tectonic plates. It's left my memory circuits full of scars that won't heal.
The devoted golfer is an anguished soul who has learned a lot about putting, just as an avalanche victim has learned a lot about snow.
Playing golf is like chasing a quinine pill around a cow pasture.
Golf seems to me an arduous way to go for a walk. I prefer to take the dogs out.
In golf, you keep your head down and follow through. In the vice presidency, you keep your head up and follow through. It's a big difference.
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