Funny Golf Quotes - Page 5

• What a shame to waste those great shots on the practice tee.

  Walter Hagen

  Golf, Practice, Waste

  18 Copy quote

• I just hope I don't have to explain all the times I've used His name in vain when I get up there.

  Bob Hope

  Golf, Names, Get Up

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• Golf is a game where white men can dress up as black pimps and get away with it.

  Robin Williams

  Golf, Men, White Man

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• And I say, 'Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know.' And he says, 'Oh, uh, there won't be any money. But when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness.' So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.

  Bill Murray

  Money, Nice, Effort

  14 Copy quote

• Most people play a fair game of golf - if you watch them.

  Joey Lauren Adams

  Golf, Games, Play

  14 Copy quote

• Never admit that your back goes out more than you do

  Joan Rivers

  Golf, Great Golf, Golfing

  7 Copy quote

• Sex is the most fun you can have without smiling.

  Madonna Ciccone

  Sex, Fun, Golf

  26 Copy quote

• I'm the best. I just haven't played yet.

  Muhammad Ali

  Golf, Boxing, Havens

  Twitter post from Sep 02, 2012

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• Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, you're the best.

  Jack Nicklaus

  Sports, Golf, Winning

  12 Copy quote

• The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil.

  Chi Chi Rodriguez

  Golf, Bags, Woods

  8 Copy quote

• The better your attitude and the harder you work, the luckier you get.

  Robert G. Allen

  Attitude, Wrestling, Golf

  Robert G. Allen (2006). “Creating Wealth: Retire in Ten Years Using Allen's Seven Principles of Wealth”, p.16, Simon and Schuster

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• My father's saying, The harder you work, the luckier you get.

  Fiona Wood

  Education, Father, Learning

  11 Copy quote

• I never learned anything from a match that I won.

  Bobby Jones

  Golf, Inspirational Golf, Great Golf

  79 Copy quote

• Golf is the most fun you can have with out taking your clothes off.

  Chi Chi Rodriguez

  Fun, Golf, Clothes

  29 Copy quote

• The harder you work, the luckier you become.

  Carl Karcher

  Wrestling, Golf, Bodybuilding

  11 Copy quote

• Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.

  Woody Allen

  Witty, Sex, Fun

  49 Copy quote

• The harder you work, the luckier you get.

  Gary Player

  Inspirational, Motivational, Work

  38 Copy quote

• Writing is the most fun you can have by yourself.

  Terry Pratchett

  Sex, Fun, Writing

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• The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows.

  P. G. Wodehouse

  Butterfly, Golf, Upset

  P. G. Wodehouse (2011). “The Clicking of Cuthbert”, p.128, The Floating Press

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• Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing.

  Ben Hogan

  Golf, Hair, Swings

  Ben Hogan (2010). “Power Golf”, p.11, Simon and Schuster

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• Putts get real difficult the day they hand out the money.

  Lee Trevino

  Real, Golf, Hands

  53 Copy quote

• I would like to deny all allegations by Bob Hope that during my last game of golf, I hit an eagle, a birdie, an elk and a moose.

  Gerald R. Ford

  Dirty, Golf, Eagles

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• The golf swing is like a suitcase into which we are trying to pack one too many things.

  John Updike

  Golf, Swings, Trying

  John Updike (2009). “More Matter: Essays and Criticism”, p.124, Random House

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• This is a game of misses. The guy who misses the best is going to win.

  Ben Hogan

  Golf, Winning, Games

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• If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out.

  Paul Gallico

  Golf, Men, Handicaps

  Paul Gallico (2015). “Farewell to Sport”, p.165, Open Road Media

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