Gilbert Gottfried Quotes - Page 2

Quotes about:

• What do Japanese Jews love to eat? Hebrew National Tsunami.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Racism, Hebrew, Jew

  9 Copy quote

• I was the class podiatrist. I never made it to class clown. I wasn't funny enough. I would examine feet and prescribe and ointment. It was a sad childhood.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Class, Feet, Childhood

  Interview with John DeBellis, www.huffingtonpost.com. February 28, 2009.

  4 Copy quote

• Well, I play Jews and parrots. Parrots are how I've branched out.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Play, Parrots, Jew

  7 Copy quote

• No, generally I think influence is used as a nice word for plagiarism.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Nice, Thinking, Influence

  4 Copy quote

• A lot of people who claim they're political comedians are just comedians who have opinions. But they stop being funny the minute they give their opinions.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  People, Giving, Political

  "Gottfried's key to political humor". Interview with Patrick Gavin, www.politico.com. August 2, 2013.

  4 Copy quote

• I found out about Jonathan Winters death a day after it happened. That seems wrong. A talent like his should be more revered. The world knew about Kim Kardashians divorce before she did.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Divorce, Winter, World

  "Gottfried: Jonathan Winters was mad brilliant" By Gilbert Gottfried, www.cnn.com. April 12, 2013.

  4 Copy quote

• Unfortunately, I've never been mistaken as Johnny Depp.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Mistaken

  7 Copy quote

• You never know what people will choose to be offended by.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  People, Knows, Offended

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  4 Copy quote

• If you have the Old Testament at home, if you flip the corner pages, you can see Jesus riding a horse.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Jesus, Horse, Home

  14 Copy quote

• Every time I give a straight answer and read it in a magazine, I say, 'Ouch.' One day I'd like to talk to a psychoanalyst about why celebrities reveal so much of themselves in interviews.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Giving, One Day, Magazines

  18 Copy quote

• When you watch Robin Williams, you can see a lot of Jonathan Winters. Robin is the first one to admit that; he worshiped Jonathan Winters.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Winter, Robins, Watches

  "Jonathan Winters was mad brilliant" by Gilbert Gottfried, www.cnn.com. April 12, 2013.

  19 Copy quote

• I guess if they ever do a remake of 'Sophie's Choice,' I could play the Meryl Streep part. I've got to work on my Polish accent. Maybe I'll be the definitive King Lear one day. You know, if they ever feel that King Lear should be more Jewy.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Kings, Play, Choices

  Interview with Christopher Kompanek and Chris Kompanek, tv.avclub.com. September 1, 2010.

  17 Copy quote

• I understand being less sexy than Osama bin Laden, but not less sexy than Carrot Top. That, I find offensive.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Sexy, Offensive, Osama Bin Laden

  "Gilbert Gottfried revels in being ‘unsexiest’" by Paige Newman, www.today.com. April 18, 2006.

  4 Copy quote

• Comedy historians take note: this Gottfried character doesn't have the best eye for detail - and, for a Jew, he doesn't have the best eye for retail, either.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Character, Eye, Details

  Gilbert Gottfried (2011). “Rubber Balls and Liquor”, p.23, Macmillan

  16 Copy quote

• One pleasant surprise was when I interviewed Butch Patrick. I was expecting this bitter old drunk, and instead he had a total sense of humor about his career and his drinking and drug problem.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Drinking, Careers, Drunk

  "Gilbert Gottfried on his Amazing Colossal Podcast, Aladdin, and surviving SNL". Interview with Will Harris, tv.avclub.com. January 06, 2016.

  11 Copy quote

• You can say "ass," but you can't say "asshole." That's why I always cringe when a character in a TV show refers to someone as an "ass." Unless you're British, calling someone an ass really doesn't work. But those are the rules of television. You can be a dirtbag, but not a scumbag.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Character, Tv Shows, Calling

  Interview with Amelie Gillette, www.avclub.com. August 9, 2005.

  7 Copy quote

• One thing I can take credit for, along with the rest of show business, is when the red ribbons were out, we cured AIDS. Any advancements that came towards fighting AIDS were not done by scientists or doctors - it was people with little ribbons on their lapels.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Fighting, Doctors, People

  5 Copy quote

• If the police ever try to pick me up, Michael Jackson told me I can hide out at his house.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  House, Police, Pick Me Up

  7 Copy quote

• I'm one of those people, in any country I'm in, if somebody could just put me in a car or a bus, I'll look out the window and say, 'OK, there's the Tower of London, there's Buckingham Palace, there's Big Ben,' and if it all takes about five minutes, perfect. I've seen all of it and I can go home.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Country, Home, People

  9 Copy quote

• If I could cause world peace by taking someone out to lunch, I'd go, 'Well, war isn't that terrible.'

  Gilbert Gottfried

  War, Lunch, World

  8 Copy quote

• I'm one of those people that picks up the remote control and just keep hitting constantly, even if I like the show I'm watching.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  People, Hitting, Remote Control

  12 Copy quote

• My family originally lived in Brooklyn. Our first apartment was a little place above my father and uncle's hardware store in Coney Island. Now, don't get the impression that we were surrounded by merry-go-rounds, roller coasters and Ferris wheels. Nope, this was a little side street.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Uncles, Father, Islands

  10 Copy quote

• The 'Phoenix Sun' did a list of the unsexiest men in the world, and I made it to number one. I beat out Bin Laden. He's a terrorist, hasn't bathed in months. I beat him out. To me it was a great honor.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Men, Phoenix, Numbers

  Interview with John DeBellis, www.huffingtonpost.com. February 28, 2009.

  4 Copy quote

• With Katrina, it's almost like the sequel that doesn't live up to the original. It's certainly a shocking event and a tragedy, but somehow as a big event it doesn't seem to carry as much weight with the public as 9/11 did.

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Tragedy, Events, Weight

  9 Copy quote

• R2D2 has gotten more work since “Star Wars” than Carrie Fisher

  Gilbert Gottfried

  Stars, War, Carrie

  8 Copy quote

Page 2 of 4

First

← Prev

1

2

3

4

Next →

• facebook
• twitter
• googleplus
• email
• linkedin