Daniel Tosh Quotes About Hate

Quotes about: Hate

• I think pro-athletes should be forced to use steroids. I think we as fans deserve the greatest athletes science can create! Lets go! Anything that will make you run faster, jump higher! I have High-Definition TV! I want my athletes like my video games! Lets go! I could care less if you die at 40. You hate life after sports anyways. I'm doing you a favor.

  Daniel Tosh

  Sports, Letting Go, Running

• I put a What Would Jesus Do bracelet on my Jewish friend's wrist and it burned his skin. He threw it on the ground, it turned into a serpent, we both started laughing. We left it there, we hate snakes. We think they're slimy, even though we know they're not.

  Daniel Tosh

  Funny, Jesus, Hate

  "Completely Serious". Comedy album by Daniel Tosh, June 17, 2007.

• Does everybody have their WWJD bracelets on? 'Cause I was wearing my bracelet recently, and I was in the movie theater, and this guy's cell phone went off - don't you just hate that? Then he picked it up, 'Hey, how's it going? I'm in a movie.' And I'm like, 'Hey! Get off the phone!' And he's like, 'Mind your own business.' And I almost went crazy, but then I looked at my bracelet: what would Jesus do? So I lit him on fire and sent him to Hell.

  Daniel Tosh

  Jesus, Hate, Crazy

• Fifty Shades Of Grey proved you can write about a dude choking women and shoving stuff up their butts but heaven forbid if you tell a legitimate joke about it. Sure I doubled the number of feminists who hate me, but I also doubled the number of shows I have on TV. No regrets.

  Daniel Tosh

  Regret, Hate, Writing

  "Tosh.0 - Season Four" by Kevin McFarland, www.avclub.com. December 05, 2012.

• I hate the idea of owning a gun, but I love the idea of owning a cannon.

  Daniel Tosh

  Hate, Gun, Ideas

• God does not hate gay people. He's just mad because they found a loophole in His system.

  Daniel Tosh

  Hate, Gay, People

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