You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.
You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.
If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.
If the gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot, you might be a redneck.
If you think 'loading the dishwasher' means 'getting your wife drunk', you might be a redneck
You might be a redneck if your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
You might be a redneck if you have every episode of Hee Haw on tape.
You might be a redneck if on your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor.
You might be a redneck if it's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it.
You might be a redneck if you think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just misunderstood.
You might be a redneck if you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge.
You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.
You might be a redneck if you have refused to watch the Academy Awards since Smokey and the Bandit was snubbed for best picture.
You might be a redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.
You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.
You might be a redneck if...Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup.
You might be a redneck if you entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.
You might be a redneck if your vehicle has a two-tone paint job - primer red and primer gray.
You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road.
or simply:
