Redneck Humor Quotes - Page 2

• You might be a redneck if...you bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Wrestling, Redneck, Vcr

  7 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Clothes, Logos

  7 Copy quote

• If your mother doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her ass, you might be a redneck.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Mother, Kissing, Redneck

  8 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Quality, Might

  8 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if the hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Doors, Color

  7 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Police, Phrases

  8 Copy quote

• If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Funny, Humor, Redneck

  6 Copy quote

• You may be a redneck if . . . you think you are an entrepreneur because of the "Dirt for Sale" sign in the front yard.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Thinking, Entrepreneur

  6 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if...Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Dining, Bottles

  16 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Needs, Might

  19 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Tattoo, Redneck, House

  7 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you have been fired from a construction job because of your appearance.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Jobs, Redneck, Might

  7 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Dad, Redneck, Might

  8 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you go to a Tupperware party for a haircut.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Party, Redneck, Tupperware

  13 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if the first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are Howdy!, Hey! or How Y'all Doin'?

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Hey, Mouths

  8 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Moon, Thinking

  8 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if the biggest fashion risk you take is which plaid you'll wear to the 4-H Fair.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Fashion, Redneck, Risk

  19 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Flower, Redneck, Yards

  9 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Might, Ifs

  7 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, House, Doe

  Jeff Foxworthy (2005). “Redneck Extreme Mobile Home Makeover: Or A Redneck Look at Fixing Up and Decorating Your House Without Loss of Limbs”, p.9, Thomas Nelson Inc

  7 Copy quote

  Show source

• If the gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot, you might be a redneck.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Feet, Car

  7 Copy quote

• You might be a redneck if you have every episode of Hee Haw on tape.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Redneck, Tape, Might

  11 Copy quote

• If you think 'loading the dishwasher' means 'getting your wife drunk', you might be a redneck

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Mean, Redneck, Thinking

  9 Copy quote

• If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Funny, Change, Humor

  Song: Redneck Stomp

  10 Copy quote

  Show source

• You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.

  Jeff Foxworthy

  Funny, Book, Humor

  19 Copy quote