The law is reason, free from passion.
Useless laws weaken the necessary laws.
War is the statesman's game, the priest's delight, the lawyer's jest, the hired assassin's trade.
Baseball is almost the only orderly thing in a very unorderly world. If you get three strikes, even the best lawyer in the world can't get you off.
About half the practice of a decent lawyer is telling would-be clients that they are damned fools and should shut up.
In America, an acquittal doesn't mean you're innocent, it means you beat the rap. My clients lose even when they win.
They all laid their heads together like as many lawyers when they are gettin' ready to prove that a man's heirs ain't got any right to his property.
It would be better to have no laws at all, than to have too many.
To succeed in the other trades, capacity must be shown; in the law, concealment of it will do.
The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer.
It grants you the power to judge others and feel superior to them. You believe you are living to a higher standard than those you judge. Enforcing rules, especially in more subtle expressions like responsibility and expectation, is a vain attempt to create certainly out of uncertainty. And contrary to what you might think, I have a great fondness for uncertainty. Rules cannot bring freedom; they only have the power to accuse.
A lawyer actually has to see all sides of a situation. Lawyers actually might be the most understanding human beings.
Immanuel Kant would've made a lousy lawyer, but a great judge!
No lawyer can afford to be ignorant of the Bible.
In the heart of every lawyer, worthy of the name, there burns a deep ambition so to bear himself that the profession may be stronger by reason of his passage through its ranks, and that he may leave the law itself a better instrument of human justice than he found it.
Lawyers spend their professional careers shoveling smoke.
Going to trial with a lawyer who considers your whole life-style a Crime in Progress is not a happy prospect.
The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.
Resilience is accepting your new reality, even if it's less good than the one you had before. You can fight it, you can do nothing but scream about what you've lost, or you can accept that and try to put together something that's good.
The one great principle of English law is to make business for itself.
You're an Attorney. It's your duty to lie, conceal, and distort everything, and slander everybody.
Lawyers are natural politicians.
I do not say that all lawyers are bad, but I do maintain that the general tendency is bad: standing up in a court for whichever side has paid you, affecting warmth and conviction, and doing everything you can to win the case, whatever your private opinion may be, will soon dull any fine sense of honour. The mercenary soldier is not a valued creature, but at least he risks his life, whereas these men merely risk their next fee.
Divorce is a game played by lawyers.
Lawyers, I suppose, were children once.
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