Lawyer Quotes - Page 20

• There are only two economists in Congress and hundreds of lawyers. Does that explain why the government is in such a mess?

  Thomas Sowell

  Government, Two, Doe

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• I heard from my cat's lawyer today; my cat wants $12,000 a week for Tender Vittles.

  Johnny Carson

  Cat, Want, Today

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• If I was a lawyer, I'd be my own best client.

  Robert Downey, Jr.

  Clients, My Own, Ifs

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• Justice requires lawyers who are prepared, witnesses who tell the truth, judges who know the law, and jurors who stay awake. Justice is the North Star, the burning bush, the holy virgin. It cannot be bought, sold, or mass produced. It is intangible, ineffable, and invisible, but if you are to spend your life in its pursuit, it is best to believe it exists, and that you can attain it.

  Paul Levine

  Stars, Believe, Law

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• A good lawyer is part con man, part priest -- promising riches, threatening hell. My ethical rules are simple. I won't lie to the court or let a client do it. But I've never been in this position. How far would I go for a woman who mattered? Is there anything I wouldn't do to win?

  Paul Levine

  Lying, Winning, Simple

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• The very notion that millions of workers displaced by the re-engineering and automation of the agricultural, manufacturing, and service sectors can be retrained to be scientists, engineers, technicians, executives, consultants, teachers, lawyers and the like, and then somehow find the appropriate number of job openings in the very narrow high-tech sector, seems at best a pipe dream, and at worst a delusion.

  Jeremy Rifkin

  Dream, Teacher, Jobs

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• It's all about the work. Nothing is going to fall into your lap. If you want to be a lawyer, see yourself as a lawyer, go to the library and start learning the law. If you want to be a rapper, start rapping and get out there. Live your life as if you already are where you want to be.

  Russell Simmons

  Rap, Fall, Law

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• Discipline is part of my professional training as a lawyer.

  Mohamed ElBaradei

  Discipline, Training, Professional Training

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• She seemed to mean what she said. She said pretty much this: I retained some lawyers, I have to move on with my life, I am divorcing you, and then she added, I need money.

  Dennis Kozlowski

  Moving, Mean, Needs

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• To get your name well enough known that you can run for a public office, some people do it by being great lawyers or philanthropists or business people or work their way up the political ladder. I happened to become known from a different route.

  John Glenn

  Running, Names, Space

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• "Why is it sports is the only thing white people see us being successful at? I don't want to play football," he said. "I wanna be a lawyer." "That's fine with me," I said, a little annoyed. "I've just never heard of a Negro lawyer, that's all. You've got to hear of these things before you can imagine them." "Bullshit. You gotta imagine what's never been."

  Sue Monk Kidd

  Sports, Football, Successful

  Barbara Taylor Bradford, Sue Monk Kidd (2001). “Of love and life: three novels selected and condensed by Reader's Digest”

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• A Seattle lawyer once interrupted his lengthy cross-examination of a witness and exclaimed, "Your Honor, one of the jurors is asleep." "You put him to sleep," replied the judge. "Suppose you wake him up."

  James Keller

  Sleep, Judging, Honor

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• In regards to Oral Roberts' claim that God told him that he would die unless he received $20 million by March, God's lawyers have stated that their client has not spoken with Roberts for several years. Off the record, God has stated that 'if I had wanted to ice the little toad, I would have done it a long time ago.

  Dennis Miller

  Years, Ice, Long

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• That D.C. grand jury investigation of Abramoff can't go on forever. Eventually the lawyers at the Public Integrity Section will go to their bosses with some decisions about just who they want to indict. That's when Al Gonzales will have to show his cards.

  Josh Marshall

  Integrity, Decision, Boss

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• It's a game. We tax lawyers teach the rich how to play it so they can stay rich-and the IRS keeps changing the rules so we can keep getting rich teaching them.

  John Grisham

  Teaching, Games, Play

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• This bill would allow an employee to bring a claim against an employer decades after the alleged initial act of discrimination occurred. Trial lawyers, you can be sure, are salivating at this very prospect.

  Buck McKeon

  Trials, Bills, Discrimination

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• The only ones who will see an increase in pay are some of the trial lawyers who bring the cases.

  Orrin Hatch

  Trials, Pay, Discrimination

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• Our lawyers had their chat with the Supreme Court Justice, and promised to repast the chat to other members of the Supreme Court to find out whether they wanted to hear us out.

  Dashiell Hammett

  Justice, Court, Members

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• If the wind is blowing like stink and everything is working right, a twelve-meter sailboat can go eleven and a half or twelve miles an hour, the same speed at which a bond lawyer runs around the Cental Park Reservoir.

  P. J. O'Rourke

  Funny, Running, Wind

  P.J. O'Rourke (2015). “Thrown Under the Omnibus”, p.159, Atlantic Books Ltd

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• The English laws punish vice; the Chinese laws do more, they reward virtue.

  Oliver Goldsmith

  Funny, Humor, Law

  Oliver Goldsmith (1794). “The Citizen of the World Or Letters from a Chinese Philosopher, Residing in London, to His Friend in the East”, p.33

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• Lawyers earn a living by the sweat of browbeating others.

  James Huneker

  Sweat

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• He saw a lawyer killing a viper on a dunghill hard by his own stable; And the Devil smiled, for it put him in mind of Cain and his brother Abel.

  Samuel Taylor Coleridge

  Brother, Mind, Devil

  Samuel Taylor Coleridge (1872). “Poetical Works of Samuel T. Coleridge”, p.88

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• "Lawyers Are": The only civil delinquents whose judges must of necessity be chosen from (amongst) themselves.

  Charles Caleb Colton

  Judging, Chosen, Delinquents

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• "Lawyers Are": By law's dark by-ways he has stored his mind with wicked knowledge on how to cheat mankind.

  George Crabbe

  Dark, Law, Mind

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• They've got about as many lawyers as we have sumo-wrestlers.

  Lee Iacocca

  Wrestler

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