Funniest Sports Quotes

• It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.

  Mark Twain

  Inspirational, Funny, Motivational

  Mark Twain (2014). “Mark Twain on Common Sense: Timeless Advice and Words of Wisdom from America's Most-Revered Humorist”, p.53, Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

  108 Copy quote

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• I owe a lot to my parents, especially by mother and my father.

  Greg Norman

  Sports, Mother, Father

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  23 Copy quote

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• Left hand, right hand, it doesn't matter. I'm amphibious.

  Charles Shackleford

  Funny, Basketball, Sports

  15 Copy quote

• I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.

  Michael Jordan

  Inspirational, Life, Motivational

  468 Copy quote

• If you come to a fork in the road, take it.

  Yogi Berra

  Funny, Happiness, Baseball

  Yogi: It Ain't Over (1989)

  59 Copy quote

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• The lead car is unique, except for the one behind it which is identical.

  Murray Walker

  Unique, Motor Racing, Nascar Racing

  45 Copy quote

• I feel like I'm the best, but you're not going to get me to say that.

  Jerry Rice

  Motivational, Sports, Football

  25 Copy quote

• When you're rich, you don't write checks. Straight cash, homey.

  Randy Moss

  Sports, Writing, Dumb

  58 Copy quote

• I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed.

  Michael Jordan

  Inspirational, Life, Motivational

  "Nike Culture : The Sign of the Swoosh". Book by Robert Goldman, Stephen Papson (p. 49), 1998.

  243 Copy quote

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• Ray Lewis is the type of guy, if he were in a fight with a bear I wouldn't help him, I'd pour honey on him because he likes to fight. That's the type of guy Ray Lewis is.

  Shannon Sharpe

  Sports, Fighting, Guy

  7 Copy quote

• I don't want to shoot my mouth in my foot, but those are games we can win.

  Sherman Douglas

  Basketball, Winning, Games

  7 Copy quote

• If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again.

  Terry Venables

  Funny, Soccer, Stupid

  27 Copy quote

• To win, I'd run over Joe's mom too.

  Matt Millen

  Mom, Running, Kids

  7 Copy quote

• Well, I don't remember all the names of all the clubs we went to

  Shaquille O'Neal

  Basketball, Names, Clubs

  6 Copy quote

• Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.

  Tiger Woods

  Basketball, Sports, Sexy

  145 Copy quote

• The only thing that keeps this organization from being recognized as one of the finest in baseball is wins and losses at the major league level.

  Chuck LaMar

  Sports, Baseball, Loss

  45 Copy quote

• Booze, broads and bullshit. If you got all that, what else do you need?

  Harry Caray

  Sports, Bullshit, Needs

  232 Copy quote

• I've never lost a game I just ran out of time.

  Michael Jordan

  Inspirational, Sports, Nba

  50 Copy quote

• You don't like to see hookers going down on players like that.

  Murray Mexted

  Sports, Player, Rugby

  11 Copy quote

• Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.

  Joe Theismann

  Funny, Sports, Football

  "Conrad Smith sees USA challenge in all black and white: it's about the win" by Alexander Bisley, www.theguardian.com. October 30, 2014.

  61 Copy quote

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• These are my new shoes. They're good shoes. They won't make you rich like me, they won't make you rebound like me, they definitely won't make you handsome like me. They'll only make you have shoes like me. That's it.

  Charles Barkley

  Basketball, Sports, Shoes

  73 Copy quote

• You can sum up this sport in two words: You never know.

  Lou Duva

  Sports, Two, Knows

  47 Copy quote

• When you get that nice celebration coming into the dugout and you're getting your ass hammered by guys, there's no better feeling than to have that done.

  Matt Stairs

  Sports, Nice, Philadelphia

  45 Copy quote

• Any time Detroit scores more than 100 points and holds the other team below 100 points they almost always win.

  Doug Collins

  Funny, Basketball, Sports

  46 Copy quote
• 

  All hockey players are bilingual. They know English and profanity.

  Gordie Howe

  Sports, Hockey, Player

  100 Copy quote