Sure the jews killed jesus, but the guy was an awful carpenter
I wouldn't say I'm bigger than Jesus. If I had to guess, I'd say probably, yeah, but as far as I know, the bible is never clear on this.
I don't have anything against this Jesus guy, but has he written, directed, and starred in his own movie?
I certainly do not consider myself the next Jesus. I'd say he was more of a precursor to Zach Braff.
I've always tried to learn from the greats: Orson Welles, Humphrey Bogart, Ghandi, Buddha, Jesus... it's just that there's this tremendous pressure to correct all the things they got wrong.
You know, I think there should be a Zach Braff Day. We could have it on December 25th and then people can decide whether they want to celebrate me or Jesus. If you ask me, the choice is pretty obvious.
When I let some girl take me in her mouth I think this is what Jesus must feel like during communion.
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