I wrote a lot of stuff quickly: pages and pages of notes that seemed pretty incoherent at first. Most of it was taken from the radio because -suddenly being a parent- I'd be confronted by the radio giving a news report every hour of the day.
When you're a parent, then you still have to commit to this concept of, "Okay, I'm basically out of action now for three months."
I sometimes have birthday parties for the kids in my neighborhood and then pretend to suggest that I am going to molest them to the parents. It's a hilarious prank even though I am not a paedophile.
My parents mistook me for a sack of potatoes so I sat in the corner of the kitchen for the first 13 years of my life. My birth name is Thom Potatoes.
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