Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.
I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters.
Kites rise highest against the wind - not with it.
All my life I've been terrible at remembering people's names. I once introduced a friend of mine as Martini. Her name was actually Olive.
Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has no heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains.
Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly.
A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he's finished.
Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.
If you owe the bank $100 that's your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that's the bank's problem.
The best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.
Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.
Happiness is good health and a bad memory.
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
Everyone smiles in the same language.
All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.
A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.
The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.
Say what you will about the ten commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them.
Most successful investors, in fact, do nothing most of the time.
If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.
'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that 'I do' is the longest sentence?
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