I find that women want to tell me about their birthing experiences. In the most excruciating detail. It's not put me off having children, but I do feel like I know too much.
Having children changes everything; it changes your entire perspective about life since from the moment they arrive your new world begins and ends with them, your concern for their welfare is paramount over everything else and your life is scheduled around their needs.
One of the things that's troubling is that people see Natalie Portman or some other Hollywood starlet who boasts of, hey look, you know, we're having children. We're not married, but we are having these children and they're doing just fine. And I think it gives a distorted image that, yes, not everybody hires nannies and caretakers and nurses.
Having children made me go down a road of serious introspection and self-examination. I think it's informed and hopefully enhanced my creativity.
It comes down to a doubt about the wisdom Of having children after having had them, So there is nothing we can do about it But warn the children they perhaps should have none.
Having children can smooth the relationship, too. Mother and daughter are now equals. That is hard to imagine, even harder to accept, for among other things, it means realizing that your own mother felt this way, too--unsure of herself, weak in the knees, terrified about what in the world to do with you. It means accepting that she was tired, inept, sometimes stupid; that she, too, sat in the dark at 2:00 A.M. with a child shrieking across the hall and no clue to the child's trouble.
Being happy is not all about love! Love is not everything. Work, friends, and achieving things... your finite thing in life can't be getting married and having children. Like, creating a life for myself that's my own, and my own road? That was always the most important thing for me. Right now, I have a kid and stuff, and it's fantastic to be a mother, but it's not the final thing. You want to stay an individual. You need to stay an individual for your kid, as an example of what a human being should be! You want to stay true to yourself and not become a half a person. That is so, so important.
Marriages are not normally made to avoid having children.
I highly recommend getting your career established first and then having children.
To me, writing is not a profession. You might as well call living a profession. Or having children. Anything you can't help doing.
There's no better way to unplug than having children. Changing diapers is one of the most leveling things that has ever happened to me.
Abortion is green! I think its irrefutable, but people don't want to hear that. For most people, having children is an instinctual, natural desire and the last thing they want to do is believe that it has any detrimental side, or if they do believe it, they think it's different for them because they live in a gated community or whatever the reason.
The very idea of having children brings out this deep revulsion in me.
All of us gardeners know that nothing comes out the way you planned. It's a different garden every year, and it's always sort of different from what you were thinking when you began. What it really means to be a good gardener is to work hard to produce an ecosystem that will have enough diversity, enough possibilities, so it's robust, and it's resilient, and it can change when the seasons change. And that kind of robust, unexpected, variable, messy system - that's what you want to create when you're having children, too.
The way that I feel about my Jewish identity has been really radically changed by events in life. Like, becoming a writer is one. Having children is another. And getting older and watching, you know, my parents and grandparents get older has been another, the seasons of - being witness to the seasons of life and wanting to have some kind of infrastructure to deal with it, to cope with them. Ritual has become more important to me as I've gotten older. It's not always religious ritual, but it often borrows from Judaism.
One of the things, and the most exciting, actually definitely the most exciting thing is, having children. You know, I didn't have children before. I had been married only a year before my space station mission, so having three-year-olds is a whole new experience and that's the new adventure. It may sound funny because people have kids every day, but having your own kids, having my own kids, was as fundamentally, or maybe even more fundamentally life changing then even flying in space.
I've had such a great run with The Dutchess...and now this. You know, it is so interesting how in this business, the second you start dating they want to know if you're engaged. The second you're engaged they want to know when you're going to be married. The second you're married, they want to know when you're having children.
It is very unusual for someone from Latin American society to openly stand by his homosexuality. In my hometown, there are still lots of prejudices against gays. We are often not considered to be fully-fledged people. The family is sacred there; having children means more than anything else.
What has surprised me most about being a celebrity is the fascination with pregnant women. After I had Rocco, the paparazzi came and sought me out. I never had that before. There's a whole industry, literally, based on people having children. I guess because you're changing, putting on weight. It makes me very uncomfortable. I didn't enjoy that much at all.
From what I understand from talking with older friends and feminists, I think that once I enter the workforce and start to think about marriage and having children, my gender will probably eclipse my feminist identity in terms of marginalization. Discrimination in terms of hiring and in the workplace are still real according to statistics. I also think, as a feminist, figuring out what a relationship based on true and complete equality is will be a challenge. But hopefully by the time I'm dealing with those issues feminists will have made great progress in all of those areas.
My mum was an actor until she started having children. I was the first child, so in a way I was the end of her acting career, which hopefully she's forgiven me for. She's still watches my show every week. It's funny because I didn't grow up in a household that felt like a theatrical household. My dad did a normal job and my mum had given up. But when I decided to try and do it - it wasn't the most alien concept.
I am definitely a person who supports mothers. I believe in having children. Maternity leave and all that stuff is super important to me. In terms of one-on-one with employees, being a mom helps me ground my roots to humanity. When someone is going through a personal issue, I can keep it on a human level.
There is no going back to a time when most women will feel compelled to enter or stay in a bad marriage just for economic security or social respectability. So today, the best way to get women once more interested in getting married and having children is for men to accept women's new insistence on equality. This is, I think, why educated women in America, are now more pro - marriage and more disapproving of divorce than other groups of women who have less experience with egalitarian partners or less clout in getting their needs met in relationships.
Having children changes your behavior. Your personality doesn't change, but you're more cautious of what you say and how you say it to start with-so that already changes things. My mind is not completely mine anymore. I used to be able to concentrate and achieve things. Now I find it much harder to focus, because it just seems that half your brain doesn't belong to you anymore. My kids are still little. Maybe it will change more when they're older, but I doubt it.
Early rejections are really tough, especially when all of your friends who you went to school with now have legitimate jobs, are getting married, having children, buying real estate, being adults. And you're still trying to figure out how to make a living doing the thing you think you love, but you're not even sure yet because you haven't even done it. It was a long road of risk and treachery.
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