Funny New Years Quotes - Page 2

• We spend January 1st walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives...not looking for flaws, but for potential.

  Ellen Goodman

  New Year, Drawing, Years

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• Ring out the old, ring in the new, Ring, happy bells, across the snow: The year is going, let him go; Ring out the false, ring in the true.

  Alfred Lord Tennyson

  Inspirational, New Year, Years

  In Memoriam canto 106 (1850)

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• The new year begins in a snow-storm of white vows.

  George William Curtis

  New Year, Determination, Years

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• May the New Year bring you courage to break your resolutions early! My own plan is to swear off every kind of virtue, so that I triumph even when I fall!

  Aleister Crowley

  New Year, Courage, Fall

  Aleister Crowley (2015). “Moonchild”, p.139, Booklassic

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• If you asked me for my New Year Resolution, it would be to find out who I am.

  Cyril Cusack

  Inspirational, New Year, Who I Am

  49 Copy quote

• Let each new year find you a better person.

  Benjamin Franklin

  New Year, Years, Old Year

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• New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back positive.

  Jay Leno

  New Year, Holiday, Years

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• Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.

  Mark Twain

  Inspirational, Funny, New Year

  Mark Twain, Paul Fatout (1997). “Mark Twain Speaks for Himself”, p.10, Purdue University Press

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• May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions.

  Joey Lauren Adams

  New Year, Holiday, Blessing

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• New Year's is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions.

  Mark Twain

  Funny, Marriage, New Year

  Mark Twain (1979). “Early Tales & Sketches, Vol. 1: 1851-1864”, p.180, Univ of California Press

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• Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average. Which means you've met your New Year's resolution.

  Jay Leno

  Funny, New Year, Mean

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• But can one still make resolutions when one is over forty? I live according to twenty-year-old habits.

  Andre Gide

  New Year, Holiday, Years

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• I made no resolutions for the New Year. The habit of making plans, of criticizing, sanctioning and molding my life, is too much of a daily event for me.

  Anais Nin

  Inspirational, Funny, New Year

  "The Early Diary of Anaïs Nin, 1923–1927" by Anaïs Nin, Volume 3, September 2, 2014.

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• Be at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let every new year find you a better man.

  Benjamin Franklin

  Inspirational, Funny, Life

  Benjamin Franklin (2007). “Poor Richard's Almanack”, p.98, Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

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• I think in terms of the day's resolutions, not the years'.

  Henry Moore

  Inspirational, New Year, Educational

  62 Copy quote

• Making resolutions is a cleansing ritual of self-assessment and repentance that demands personal honesty and, ultimately, reinforces humility. Breaking them is part of the cycle.

  Eric Zorn

  Funny, New Year, Honesty

  60 Copy quote

• The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to.

  P. J. O'Rourke

  Inspirational, New Year, Clever

  P. J. O'Rourke (2007). “Modern Manners: An Etiquette Book for Rude People”, p.138, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

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• Let our New Year's resolution be this: we will be there for one another as fellow members of humanity, in the finest sense of the word.

  Goran Persson

  Inspirational, New Year, Time

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• For last year's words belong to last year's language And next year's words await another voice.

  T. S. Eliot

  Inspirational, New Year, New Beginnings

  T. S. Eliot (2014). “Complete Poems and Plays, 1909-1950”, p.150, Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

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• Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to.

  Bill Vaughan

  Motivational, Christmas, New Year

  64 Copy quote

• The object of a New Year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul and a new nose; new feet, a new backbone, new ears, and new eyes. Unless a particular man made New Year resolutions, he would make no resolutions. Unless a man starts afresh about things, he will certainly do nothing effective.

  Gilbert K. Chesterton

  Inspirational, New Year, Eye

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• From New Year's on the outlook brightens; good humor lost in a mood of failure returns. I resolve to stop complaining.

  Leonard Bernstein

  Funny, New Year, Years

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• the object of a new year is not that we should have a new year, but rather that we should have a new soul.

  Gilbert K. Chesterton

  Inspiring, New Year, Inspiration

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• I would say happy new year, but it's not happy; it's exactly the same as last year except colder.

  Robert Clark

  Inspirational, New Year, Years

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• Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.

  Oscar Wilde

  Funny, New Year, Holiday

  16 Copy quote