Believe me, Hillary Clinton has tremendous hate in her heart.
We all make choices. Believe me, I would like to write the hit of the world. It's not like I have any desire to be in the shadows. My vision isn't marketing. Some people want to sell 6 million albums. There's nothing wrong with that. It's just not what I do. I'd rather look at a piece of work and say it's great rather than it's successful.
We inherited a national debt that has doubled in eight years. Think of it - $20 trillion. It's doubled. And we inherited a foreign policy marked by one disaster after another. We don't win anymore. When was the last time we won? Did we win a war? Do we win anything? Do we win anything? We're going to win. We're going to win big, folks. We're going to start winning again, believe me.
My administration will not answer to donors or lobbyists or special interests, but we will serve the citizens of the United States of America, believe me.
[John McCain] didn't believe me. I think anybody who's been in a POW camp for five years can - take eight minutes on The Daily Show.
I Google'd myself a lot of times believe me. A lot of people know more about me than I knew.
We're still promoting stupid wasteful behavior in agribusiness - everything from ethanol production for cars to genetically modified crops. In commerce just about everything we do politically is in the service of WalMart and the systems tied to it. In transportation, we could, for instance, have compelled General Motors to produce railroad rolling stock as a condition of their bail-out, but we didn't do that. Instead, we're chasing the phantom of electric cars - and, believe me, we are going to be mortally disappointed how that works out.
I just want a man -a real, two-balled masculine guy -and there aren't many of them around, believe me. But I do want somebody my own age, and somebody who has brains enough to keep me interested and to earn enough money to support me in the style to which I've become accustomed.
Nobody believes in me more than me.
Believe me, man, there are people who are going to have way more troubles mentally than I am.
That's through intelligence, not through ignorance, believe me. Because some of the things that they're asking you to do [in the Army] and be politically correct about are ridiculous.
And believe me, this country thinks it's [using private e-mail by Hillary Clinton] - really thinks it's disgraceful, also
I was in Antwerp - which, I had about 20 shows left at that point - and a guy said, "That's Dave Attell's." Also, Antwerp was my smallest audience, so the guy was right there. I was like, "What?" He said, "Dave Attell does a bit about, 'Why are there luggage stores in the airport?'" I had never seen that, and I would never ever, ever, ever - please believe me - I would never lift material from somebody ever, and certainly not knowingly.
The world protested our invasion of Iraq, but the people of America were never made aware of that - through the censorship that goes on here, and believe me it's going on here.
You look at Iran, you look at North Korea, you look at terrorists, we don't even know where to look. We don't know where to look. But believe me, you can look all over, so we are going to do that. We need a form of shield. We want to protect our country.
Believe me, my sole purpose is to make as much money as possible; for after good health it is the best thing to have.
He [Vladimir Putin] will not be able to push Donald Trump around the world. Believe me.
We have the worst revival of an economy since the Great Depression. And believe me: We're in a bubble right now.
Believe me: The day [Barack] Obama goes off, and he leaves, and goes out to the golf course for the rest of his life to play golf, when they raise interest rates, you're going to see some very bad things happen, because the Fed is not doing their job. The Fed is being more political than Secretary [Hillary] Clinton.
When you have your staff taking the Fifth Amendment, taking the Fifth so they're not prosecuted, when you have the man that set up the illegal server taking the Fifth, I think it's disgraceful. And believe me, this country thinks it's - really thinks it's disgraceful, also.
They [Iran] are going to end up getting nuclear. I met with Bibi Netanyahu the other day. Believe me, he's not a happy camper.
I'll never forget my worst business decision. I bought a Nissan Pathfinder with my first signing bonus. I didn't even have a place to live, but I bought a car. Not a smart move but, believe me, I learned from that mistake.
Here is a pragmatic and idealistic suggestion, White America! When you see my kids on the playground, on the street, can you remember to smile at them as you would smile at your own? Because believe me as your better angel already does they are every bit as lovable.
You need to reinvent yourself every day when you are doing creative work. I always say that the moment I feel I'm at the top of the mountain and I cannot do more, I would be finished. So that's why I always feel the earth quake beneath my feet. I always feel myself on the fire. Because I think this is something that gives you the right adrenaline to work and go forward in your professional life. I have reinvented myself, believe me, many times in my life!
I have to be really careful, because I have nothing but love for this entity known as "the customer" in entertainment. I would never, ever, ever put myself above them and say, "They don't get it, but it's funny, believe me." If they're not laughing, I'm doing my job wrong.
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