Solitude would be ideal if you could pick the people to avoid.
Intercourse with a woman is sometimes a satisfactory substitute for masturbation. But it takes a lot of imagination to make it work.
Corruption is worse than prostitution. The latter might endanger the morals of an individual, the former invariably endangers the morals of the entire country.
Journalist: a person without any ideas but with an ability to express them; a writer whose skill is improved by a deadline: the more time he has, the worse he writes.
Morality is a venereal disease. Its primary stage is called virtue; its secondary stage, boredom; its tertiary stage, syphilis.
Psychoanalysis is the mental illness it purports to cure
Sexuality poorly repressed unsettles some families; well repressed, it unsettles the whole world.
Journalists write because they have nothing to say, and have something to say because they write.
He who does without the praise of the crowd will not deny himself an opportunity to be his own adherent.
Sex education is legitimate in that girls cannot be taught soon enough how children don't come into the world.
I am already so popular that anyone who vilifies me becomes more popular than I am.
The closer the look one takes at a word, the greater distance from which it looks back.
There are people who can never forgive a beggar for their not having given him anything.
I don't like to meddle in my private affairs.
Virginity is the ideal of those who want to deflower.
To me all men are equal: there are jackasses everywhere, and I have the same contempt for them all.
My unconscious knows more about the consciousness of the psychologist than his consciousness knows about my unconscious.
No ideas and the ability to express them - that's a journalist.
Democracy divides people into workers and loafers. It makes no provision for those who have no time to work.
Scandal begins when the police put a stop to it.
The mission of the press is to spread culture while destroying the attention span.
A bibliophile has approximately the same relationship to literature as a philatelist to geography.
A fine world in which man reproaches woman with fulfilling his heart's desire!
The trouble with Germans is not that they fire shells, but that they engrave them with quotations from Kant.
An idea's birth is legitimate if one has the feeling that one is catching oneself plagiarizing oneself.
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