Douglas William Jerrold Quotes - Page 3

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Crime Duty Funny Heart Peace Pleasure Wit

I never hear the rattling of dice that it does not sound to me like the funeral bell of the whole family.

Douglas William Jerrold

Gambling, Funeral, Sound

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If an earthquake were to engulf England tomorrow, the English would manage to meet and dine somewhere among the rubbish, just to celebrate the event.

Douglas William Jerrold

Earthquakes, Events, Rubbish

Quoted in Blanchard Jerrold The Life and Remains of Douglas Jerrold (1859), ch.14.

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The blackest of fluid is used as an agent to enlighten the world.

Douglas William Jerrold

Ink, Agents, World

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Women, somehow, have the same fear of witty men as of fireworks.

Douglas William Jerrold

Witty, Men, Fireworks

Douglas William Jerrold, Blanchard Jerrold (1859). “Specimens of Douglas Jerrold's wit: together with selections, chiefly from his contributions to journals, intended to illustrate his opinions”, p.53

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Jewels! It's my belief that when woman was made, jewels were invented only to make her the more mischievous.

Douglas William Jerrold

Jewels, Belief, Made

Douglas William Jerrold, Blanchard Jerrold (1859). “Specimens of Douglas Jerrold's wit: together with selections, chiefly from his contributions to journals, intended to illustrate his opinions”, p.24

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We love peace, as we abhor pusillanimity; but not peace at any price.

Douglas William Jerrold

Love, Peace, Peace Love

"The Wit and Opinions of Douglas Jerrold".

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That man is thought a dangerous knave, Or zealot plotting crime, Who for advancement of his kind Is wiser than his time.

Douglas William Jerrold

Men, Knaves, Reputation

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A creature undefiled by the taint of the world, unvexed by its injustice, unwearied by its hollow pleasures; a being fresh from the source of light, with something of its universal lustre in it. If childhood be this, how holy the duty to see that in its onward growth it shall be no other!

Douglas William Jerrold

Children, Light, Childhood

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Luck, mere luck may make even madness wisdom.

Douglas William Jerrold

Luck, May, Madness

Douglas William Jerrold, Blanchard Jerrold (1859). “Specimens of Douglas Jerrold's wit: together with selections, chiefly from his contributions to journals, intended to illustrate his opinions”, p.122

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Wit, like money, bears an extra value when rung down immediately it is wanted. Men pay severely who require credit.

Douglas William Jerrold

Men, Credit, Pay

Douglas William Jerrold, Blanchard Jerrold (1859). “Specimens of Douglas Jerrold's wit: together with selections, chiefly from his contributions to journals, intended to illustrate his opinions”, p.103

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As for the brandy, "nothing extenuate"; and the water, put nought in in malice.

Douglas William Jerrold

Water, Liquor, Brandy

Douglas William Jerrold, Blanchard Jerrold (1859). “Specimens of Douglas Jerrold's wit: together with selections, chiefly from his contributions to journals, intended to illustrate his opinions”, p.34

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What women would do if they could not cry, nobody knows. What poor, defenceless creatures they would be!

Douglas William Jerrold

Would Be, Cry, Poor

Douglas William Jerrold, Blanchard Jerrold (1859). “Specimens of Douglas Jerrold's wit: together with selections, chiefly from his contributions to journals, intended to illustrate his opinions”, p.89

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That questionable superfluity small beer.

Douglas William Jerrold

Beer, Questionable

Douglas William Jerrold (1853). “Collected Writings”, p.311

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There are some people as obtuse in recognizing an argument as they are in appreciating wit. You couldn't drive it into their heads with a hammer.

Douglas William Jerrold

People, Appreciate, Hammers

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Nothing is so beneficial to a young author as the advice of a man whose judgment stands constitutionally at the freezing-point.

Douglas William Jerrold

Men, Advice, Authorship

Douglas William Jerrold, Blanchard Jerrold (1859). “Specimens of Douglas Jerrold's wit: together with selections, chiefly from his contributions to journals, intended to illustrate his opinions”, p.73

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There is peace more destructive of the manhood of living man than war is destructive of his material body.

Douglas William Jerrold

Peace, War, Men

Douglas William Jerrold (1858). “Specimens of Douglas Jerrold's Wit: Together with Selections, Chiefly from His Contributions to Journals : Intended to Illustrate Hs Opinions”, p.176

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A coquette is like a recruiting sergeant, always on the lookout for fresh victims.

Douglas William Jerrold

Coquette, Coquetry, Victim

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Habitual intoxication is the epitome of every crime.

Douglas William Jerrold

Crime, Epitome, Intoxication

Douglas William Jerrold, Blanchard Jerrold (1859). “Specimens of Douglas Jerrold's wit: together with selections, chiefly from his contributions to journals, intended to illustrate his opinions”, p.41

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He is one of those wise philanthropists who, in a time of famine, would vote for nothing but a supply of toothpicks.

Douglas William Jerrold

Wise, Time, Vote

Douglas William Jerrold, Blanchard Jerrold (1859). “Specimens of Douglas Jerrold's wit: together with selections, chiefly from his contributions to journals, intended to illustrate his opinions”, p.14

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Duty, though set about by thorns, may still be made a staff supporting even while it tortures. Cast it away, and, like the prophet's wand, it changes to a snake.

Douglas William Jerrold

Snakes, May, Thorns

Douglas William Jerrold (1851). “St. Giles and St. James”, p.277

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A man is in no danger so long as he talks his love; but to write it is to impale himself on his own pothooks.

Douglas William Jerrold

Writing, Men, Long

Douglas William Jerrold, Blanchard Jerrold (1859). “Specimens of Douglas Jerrold's wit: together with selections, chiefly from his contributions to journals, intended to illustrate his opinions”, p.48

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Nature designed us to be of good cheer.

Douglas William Jerrold

Cheer, Good Cheer, Cheerfulness

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Fortunes made in no time are like shirts made in no time; it's ten to one if they hang long together.

Douglas William Jerrold

Time, Educational, Long

Douglas William Jerrold (1863). “The Works of Douglas Jerrold”

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A piece of simple goodness--a letter gushing from the heart; a beautiful unstudied vindication of the worth and untiring sweetness of human nature--a record of the invulnerability of man, armed with high purpose, sanctified by truth.

Douglas William Jerrold

Beautiful, Heart, Simple

Douglas William Jerrold (1853). “Punch's letters to his son, Punch's complete letter writer, and Sketches of the English”, p.211

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Some of 'em [virtues] like extinct volcanoes,
with a strong memory or fire and brimstone.

Douglas William Jerrold

Strong, Memories, Fire

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Born: January 3, 1803
Died: June 8, 1857
Occupation: Dramatist
Cite this Page: Citation

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