Tim Allen Quotes About Comedy

Quotes about: Comedy

• Dad needs to show an incredible amount of respect and humor and friendship toward his mate so the kids understand their parents are sexy, they're fun, they do things together, they're best friends. Kids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they're going to respect Mom.

  Tim Allen

  Friendship, Teamwork, Mom

  "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

• Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn't go far didn't see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was grounded.

  Tim Allen

  Funny, Humor, Nephew

• Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we've always had: work, or prison.

  Tim Allen

  Jobs, Children, Men

• Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.

  Tim Allen

  Funny, Witty, Dating

• Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything.

  Tim Allen

  Men, Pigs, Comedy

  "It's a Man's World: 800 Jokes from the Guy's (Warped) Point of View". Book by Judy Brown, 2005.

• Never comment on a woman's rear end. Never use the words 'large' or 'size' with 'rear end'. Never. Avoid the area altogether. Trust me.

  Tim Allen

  Use, Size, Comedy

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

• Comedy is the ultimate anarchist.

  Tim Allen

  Comedy, Anarchist, Ultimate

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

• My comedy is not mine. It's a gift. I'm not that smart.

  Tim Allen

  Smart, Comedy, Mines

  "Tim Allen: What I've Learned" by Cal Fussman, www.esquire.com. November 2011.

• While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously.

  Tim Allen

  Giving, Judging, Together

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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