Michael Showalter Quotes

Quotes about:

• A lot of my humor centers on the act of telling jokes and I think this can prevent certain audiences from suspending their feeling of disbelief. It might piss a few people off, but I can't help it.

  Michael Showalter

  Thinking, People, Feelings

  7 Copy quote

• I'm not sure why I like cats so much. I mean, they're really cute obviously. They are both wild and domestic at the same time.

  Michael Showalter

  Cute, Mean, Cat

  Interview with Stefan Sirucek, www.huffingtonpost.com. December 18, 2012.

  6 Copy quote

• In my perfect world order, it is cold all the time. Everyone wears sweaters and drinks coffee. People don't speak to each other; they read the newspaper. There is no loud music, and cats are in charge.

  Michael Showalter

  Coffee, Cat, Sweaters

  Michael Showalter (2011). “Mr. Funny Pants”, p.117, Hachette UK

  7 Copy quote

• I think gay people deserve all the same rights as everybody else, it's just that marriage is specifically for a man and a woman.

  Michael Showalter

  Gay, Men, Thinking

  Source: www.ericspitznagel.com

  7 Copy quote

• I calculated that if I wrote five pages a day, which seemed very doable, I would have an 1,800-page first draft when the deadline rolled around. Though completely unwritten, I was very impressed with how long my first draft would be.

  Michael Showalter

  Long, Would Be, Pages

  6 Copy quote

• Love is such a confusing word. You think I'm joking but I'm not.

  Michael Showalter

  Thinking, Love Is, Confusing

  4 Copy quote

• I think narcissists are endlessly watchable. The way they view the world and the way they interact within the world.

  Michael Showalter

  Thinking, Views, World

  "Q&A: Michael Ian Black and Michael Showalter". Interview with Eric Spitznagel, www.ericspitznagel.com. July 17, 2009.

  4 Copy quote

• Maybe in 10 years,I'll only be doing "classical" comedy. Or crashing my car into trees.

  Michael Showalter

  Car, Tree, Comedy

  Source: www.avclub.com

  4 Copy quote

• If your dad is anything like mine, then you have no clue what to buy him for Father's Day. The only Father's Day tradition in my family is the annual conversation he and I have where I say, 'Hey, Dad, what do you want for Father's Day this year?' and he says, 'Nothing.' Then I ask my mom what I should get him and she says, 'He likes sandalwood soap, dangly jewelry and Chanel No. 5 perfume.'

  Michael Showalter

  Mom, Fathers Day, Dad

  11 Copy quote

• In real life, comedians aren't funny.

  Michael Showalter

  Real, Real Life, Comedian

  "Q&A: Michael Ian Black and Michael Showalter". Interview with Eric Spitznagel, www.ericspitznagel.com. July 17, 2009.

  4 Copy quote

• I just made a movie. There's a kind of a banter that some people might recognize as being screwball. There are no cell phones, no DVD playersit's set in a timeless Brooklyn. Hopefully, it's a good, old-fashioned movie.

  Michael Showalter

  Phones, Dvds, Cells

  4 Copy quote

• I don't personally feel comfortable performing in a comedy club, mainly because as an audience member, I've never enjoyed that experience. It feels a little bit theme-park-ish to me, in that it's a club whose product is comedy. I find that weird. It's like those specialty chocolate stores, where everything is chocolate. It's too specific. I like going somewhere that specializes in variety.

  Michael Showalter

  Chocolate, Comedy, Performing

  Source: www.avclub.com

  4 Copy quote

• I like the comedians that go into detail and tell longer stories.

  Michael Showalter

  Comedian, Stories, Details

  Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. January 28, 2008.

  5 Copy quote

• For me, Twitter works best as a way of taking pictures of being stuck in traffic on the Brooklyn Bridge. If people really want to read really funny quips about life, parenting, and pop culture, then by all means read Michael Ian Black's tweets.

  Michael Showalter

  Mean, Brooklyn Bridge, Bridges

  Michael Showalter and Michael Ian Black Have Issues with Twitter" by Michael Showalter and Michael Ian Black, www.esquire.com. July 29, 2009.

  4 Copy quote

• I tend to a lot of improvisational ranting, and that's fun. For me, stand-up has been, performance-wise, a really good outlet.

  Michael Showalter

  Wise, Fun, Outlets

  Interview with Sean O'Neal, www.avclub.com. January 28, 2008.

  4 Copy quote

• I like doing all different types of comedy - stand-up, sketch, movies, TV. I like to try everything.

  Michael Showalter

  Trying, Different, Comedy

  Interview with Sean O'Neal, tv.avclub.com. January 28, 2008.

  4 Copy quote

• I knew that if I was going to write a book, I was going to have to read one, too.

  Michael Showalter

  Book, Writing, Ifs

  4 Copy quote

• Cats are unpredictable because they're wild and domestic at the same time. Watching a cat's behavior is like a small window into the wild.

  Michael Showalter

  Cat, Window, Behavior

  Source: www.ericspitznagel.com

  4 Copy quote

• I feel like marriage is a sacred institution that should only be between a man and a woman. If a gay couple wants to be married, why can't they just be satisfied with a civil union? Why do they have to get "married"?

  Michael Showalter

  Couple, Gay, Men

  Source: www.ericspitznagel.com

  4 Copy quote

• I'm not big on fat jokes. That's a little beneath me. I'm not a huge fan of making a joke completely at someone else's expense. Even though I think he does it better than anyone else, I don't love... Well, it's different with Sacha Baron Cohen, but that whole thing where you're "punking" people? I don't like that. I don't like doing it, and I don't particularly find it funny when the joke is on a person who doesn't know they're being set up.

  Michael Showalter

  Thinking, People, Different

  Source: www.avclub.com

  4 Copy quote

• Will Ferrell is probably the funniest comic actor, certainly of my generation. I am a huge, huge Will Ferrell fan. I'm not a huge comedy buff, truthfully. What I find funny is either something unbelievably stupid, like Dumb And Dumber or Airplane!, where the jokes are just so stupid and pointless, or something like The Office or The Comeback, where the humor is in the excruciating awkwardness of a situation. Stella kind of explores both of those, stupidity and awkwardness.

  Michael Showalter

  Stupid, Airplane, Office

  Interview with Sean O'Neal, tv.avclub.com. January 28, 2008.

  4 Copy quote

• I like silly things. I think that "silly-stupid" or "stupid-smart" might be my philosophy, which is to combine a veneer of intelligence with an undercurrent of crass stupidity. Sometimes that stupidity is in the form of the actual joke that's being told, or it could be in the way the joke is told. Like, repetition is really stupid, but it's really funny. Or it could be that the punchline itself is stupid.

  Michael Showalter

  Philosophy, Stupid, Silly

  Source: www.avclub.com

  4 Copy quote

• I am very athletic, actually, and I'm good at most sports. But I was never a successful athlete, because I have a lot of trouble with authority. To be a good athlete, you have to have sort of a military attitude. You have to enjoy being coached, and that was not something I ever liked. But more than that, I don't like practice, and coaches hate anybody that doesn't like practice. If you saw me throwing a football, you'd say, "Wow, he knows how to throw a football." But put me on a field, I'm not gonna stand out.

  Michael Showalter

  Sports, Football, Attitude

  Source: www.avclub.com

  4 Copy quote

• I know more about sports than I know about any other subject, unfortunately. I'm embarrassed to admit that.

  Michael Showalter

  Sports, Embarrassed

  Source: www.avclub.com

  4 Copy quote

• I'm writing a memoir. I'm four pages in. I start with my first memory, which is kicking my uncle in the balls. I was four.

  Michael Showalter

  Memories, Writing, Memoir

  Interview with Sean O'Neal, tv.avclub.com. January 28, 2008.

  4 Copy quote

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