you have to be very careful when you give to others that you don't tell them how great you are rather than how much you value them.
It can be much harder to be on the receiving end of a transaction than to be the one who gets to give. In fact, being given to can mean being taken from. There is a very strong connection between pride and giving, and those who do the giving get to feel that they are worthy, while those who are given to often feel that they are not.
Marriage is supposed to do everything, like Duz, which is more than half its problem. It is said to save us, define us, give us purpose, keep us from loneliness, and incidentally balance our diet and wash our socks, and when it doesn't, we get divorced.
But who would rush at a benighted man, and give him two black eyes for being blind?
The act is unjustifiable that either begs for a blessing, or, having succeeded gives no thanksgiving.
Until you divest yourself of the notion that you are a collection of needs, an empty vessel that someone else must fill up, there will be no safe place to harbor yourself, no safe shore to reach. As long as you think mostly of getting, you will have nothing real to give.
It takes great generosity to accept generosity.
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