The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.
Don't simply retire from something; have something to retire to.
Preparation for old age should begin not later than one's teens. A life which is empty of purpose until 65 will not suddenly become filled on retirement.
Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it.
Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it to the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money.
The question isn't at what age I want to retire, it's at what income.
Exert your talents, and distinguish yourself, and don't think of retiring from the world, until the world will be sorry that you retire.
A retired husband is often a wife's full-time job.
When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking.
The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender.
Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.
Retirement: That's when you return from work one day and say, "Hi, Honey, I'm home - forever."
I advise you to go on living solely to enrage those who are paying your annuities. It is the only pleasure I have left.
The Republican Party is a friend of Social Security the way Colonel Sanders was a friend of chickens.
Age appears to be best in four things; old wood best to burn, old wine to drink, old friends to trust, and old authors to read.
I really stay busy [in retirement]. I often have to cancel my golf games on the weekends to go play in tennis tournaments.
There's an enormous number of managers who have retired on the job.
In this country men seem to live for action as long as they can and sink into apathy when they retire.
There's one thing I always wanted to do before I quit... Retire!
Although it may not be a castle, [it is the] functional equivalent of a hotel room, a vacation and retirement home or a hunting and fishing cabin.
I want to be with my wife. Sitting on a deckchair, sipping some tea, and reading books in a retirement home, in a beautiful and warm place. I'm a romantic guy.
Modeling was another job like some of the other ones I had. Working as a cashier, I delivered newspapers, I worked in a retirement home feeding elderly people. . . so I never stopped and thought about, boy, I'm a successful model.
For now I'm building up stories for the retirement home!
You must prepare yourselves, young people, because Uncle Dave's generation is getting old. We are almost ready to go to the retirement home to spend the rest of our days tapping our bedpans rhythmically in time to "easy listening" rock 'n' roll. We must pass the torch on to you, and you must grasp it, ideally by the end that is not on fire.
[Ed Grimley] lives in a retirement home in New Jersey. It's called the Retirement Home in New Jersey for Characters Who Were Interesting in the '80s for About an Hour. He's there with the Whiners, Gumby and Jon Lovitz's 'That's the ticket' guy.
Follow AzQuotes on Facebook, Twitter and Google+. Every day we present the best quotes! Improve yourself, find your inspiration, share with friends
or simply: