Hockey captures the essence of Canadian experience in the New World. In a land so inescapably and inhospitably cold, hockey is the chance of life, and an affirmation that despite the deathly chill of winter we are alive.
Hockey belongs to the Cartoon Network, where a person can be pancaked by an ACME anvil, then expanded - accordion-style - back to full stature, without any lasting side effect.
We get nose jobs all the time in the NHL, and we don't even have to go to the hospital.
I don't like my hockey sticks touching other sticks, and I don't like them crossing one another, and I kind of have them hidden in the corner. I put baby powder on the ends. I think it's essentially a matter of taking care of what takes care of you.
Hockey is a fast, body-contact game played by men with clubs in their hands and knives laced to their feet.
A puck is a hard rubber disk that hockey players strike when they can't hit one another.
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