He is inexperienced, but he's experienced in terms of what he's been through.
If he'd been English or Swedish, he'd have walked the England job.
Whichever country you are, if you lose games you are criticised. It's only when it's England it's like a new world war.
It was a titanic effort.
It had not crossed my mind, but maybe it has Mourinho's because that is what Chelsea did two seasons ago to Xabi Alonso.
It is like having a blanket that is too small for the bed, you pull the blanket up to keep your chest warm, and your feet stick out. I cannot buy a bigger blanket because the supermarket is closed. But the blanket I have is made of cashmere. So it's good.
For me pressure is bird flu. I'm serious. I'm feeling a lot of pressure with the problem in Scotland. It's not fun and I'm more scared of it than football. Football is nothing compared with life. For me bird flu is the drama of the last few days. I'll have to buy a mask.
We all want to play great music all the time, but if that is not possible, you have to hit as many right notes as you can.
Look at my haircut. I am ready for the war. The objective is to win the Premiershp. I don't want to dominate, to finish without defeat, record points or goals or consecutive wins. The Premiership is so difficult you cannot be focused on that. I just think about winning.
It is like when you go to war: we have to know how our enemies attack and defend.
Drogba is a fighter. He is the kind of player I would say 'With you I could go to every war.'
Do you have a brother or cousin in Ivory Coast, because I don't have the money to bring you to Porto.
He predicts things. I have often heard him say things which are proved right minutes later. Its really impressive - almost mystical.
We played a whole season unbeaten but you did not see me every week jumping on the tables. Once it's over it's over and you do in the next one as well as you can. Plenty of managers who have won the Champions League will not be considered great managers.
I don't have to be jealous of Barcelona because they have 100 years of history and have won the European Cup once. I have only been managing for five years and I have the same amount of Champions League trophies to my name.
If Ashley Cole is ready we have 15 players for the final. I'll have to choose between Hilario, who's not bad playing forward or I'll bring in one of the kids.
The dog is in Portugal and the city of London is safe.
Faith-healing is peculiar enough at the best of times, but applying it to football merits a special league of barking. Why would God bother to perform a miracle that enabled Sol Campbell to yell Oh holy Jesus, now I can win the ball in the air. It's been five years since I could defend from corners, brothers and sisters, it's a miracle.
The FA would remove him tomorrow if they had a spine, but clearly, in former lives, were cruel to jellyfish which is why they have returned as them now.
I must have been a failed football coach in a previous incarnation.
When I take my kids to the zoo in Los Angeles, they always look the longest at the creature that moves the least - especially those in the reptile house. I asked myself: 'Who are the people that are pretty cool but also very still and monotone in their expression?' and I thought of Jose Mourinho.
If something is not right we give out about it. He is almost a Yorkshireman with a Portuguese accent.
I don't get what's happening to Jose Mourinho of late. He's lapsing into the kind of Portuguese moroseness you get from staring at the Atlantic horizon and imagining you're the last place in the world, while listening to endless renditions of the fado. His latest line about 'everyone hates us and we don't care' sounds like vintage Joe Kinnear in the great days of the Wimbledon Crazy Gang.
Eleven against eleven they never beat us.
The longer Jose Mourinho goes on, and on, and on, the more difficult it is for me not to despise him and the set of values he's bringing to football.
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