Daniel Handler Quotes - Page 4

Quotes about:

• I often can't remember which scenes are and aren't in the final product, because I saw so many different versions of the Lemony Snicket that I forget which ended up on the cutting-room floor.

  Daniel Handler

  Cutting, Often Can, Different

  Interview with Tasha Robinson, www.avclub.com. November 16, 2005.

  9 Copy quote

• For some stories, it's easy. The moral of 'The Three Bears,' for instance, is "Never break into someone else's house.' The moral of 'Snow White' is 'Never eat apples.' The moral of World War I is 'Never assassinate Archduke Ferdinand.

  Daniel Handler

  War, White, Apples

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• The quoting of an aphorism, like the angry barking of a dog or the smell of overcooked broccoli, rarely indicates that something helpful is about to happen.

  Daniel Handler

  Dog, Smell, Helpful

  "Lemony Snicket, Horseradish: Bitter Truths You Can't Avoid". Book by Daniel Handler, 2007.

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• Are you ready?" Klaus asked finally. "No," Sunny answered. "Me neither," Violet said, "but if we wait until we're ready we'll be waiting for the rest of our lives, Let's go.

  Daniel Handler

  Inspirational, Waiting, Violet

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• Oftentimes. when people are miserable, they will want to make other people miserable, too. But it never helps.

  Daniel Handler

  Sad, People, Want

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• I’m not a romantic, I’m a half-wit. Only stupid people would think I’m smart. I’m not something anyone should know. I’m a lunatic wandering around for scraps, I’m like every single miserable moron I’ve scorned and pretended I didn’t recognize. I’m all of them, every last ugly thing in a bad last-minute costume. I’m not different, not at all, not different from any other speck of a thing. I’m a blemished blemish, a ruined ruin, a stained wreck so failed I can’t see what I used to be.

  Daniel Handler

  Smart, Stupid, Thinking

  Daniel Handler (2012). “Why We Broke Up”, p.196, Egmont UK

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• It is a curious thing, the death of a loved one. We all know that our time in this world is limited, and that eventually all of us will end up underneath some sheet, never to wake up. And yet it is always a surprise when it happens to someone we know. It is like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark, and thinking there is one more stair than there is. Your foot falls down, through the air, and there is a sickly moment of dark surprise as you try and readjust the way you thought of things.

  Daniel Handler

  Death, Fall, Dark

  "Horseradish: Bitter Truths You Can't Avoid". Book by Daniel Handler, April 24, 2007.

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• It is one of life's bitterest truths that bedtime so often arrives just when things are really getting interesting.

  Daniel Handler

  Sleep, Interesting, Bedtime

  "The Grim Grotto". Book by Daniel Handler, September 21, 2004.

  4 Copy quote

• The moral of Snow White is never eat apples.

  Daniel Handler

  White, Apples, Snow

  "The Miserable Mill". Book by Daniel Handler, 2000.

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• If you have ever had a miserable experience, then you have probably had it said to you that you would feel better in the morning. This, of course, is utter nonsense, because a miserable experience remains a miserable experience even on the loveliest of morning.

  Daniel Handler

  Morning, Feel Better, Miserable

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• The book was long, and difficult to read, and Klaus became more and more tired as the night wore on. Occasionally his eyes would close. He found himself reading the same sentence over and over. He found himself reading the same sentence over and over. He found himself reading the same sentence over and over.

  Daniel Handler

  Book, Reading, Writing

  "The Bad Beginning". Book by Daniel Handler, September 30, 1999.

  7 Copy quote

• This toast feels raw. Is it safe to eat raw toast?

  Daniel Handler

  Safe, Feels, Toasts

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• Keep anyone with whom you can read in silence.

  Daniel Handler

  Silence

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• Sometimes, even the best of plans will occur to you when it is too late.

  Daniel Handler

  Too Late, Sometimes, Late

  "Fictional character: Lemony Snicket". "A Series of Unfortunate Events" (TV Series), www.imdb.com. (2017-).

  4 Copy quote

• and what might seem to be a series of unfortunate events may in fact be the first steps of a journey.

  Daniel Handler

  Journey, Events, May

  "Fictional character: Violet Baudelaire". "A Series of Unfortunate Events", www.imdb.com. 2004.

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• Well-read people are less likely to be evil.

  Daniel Handler

  People, Evil, Wells

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• It seemed to me that every adult did something terrible sooner or later. And every child, I thought, sooner or later becomes an adult.

  Daniel Handler

  Children, Adults, Terrible

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• But just suddenly I really, really needed to see you again right that minute, that night.

  Daniel Handler

  Night, Minutes, You Again

  Daniel Handler (2012). “Why We Broke Up”, p.15, Egmont UK

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• He who hesitates is lost

  Daniel Handler

  Lost

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• There are few sights sadder than a ruined book.

  Daniel Handler

  Sad, Book, Reading

  "The Wide Window (A Series of Unfortunate Events, Book 3)". Book by Lemony Snicket (pen name of Daniel Handler), February 25, 2000.

  6 Copy quote

• Knowing that something is wrong and doing it anyway happens very often in life, and I doubt I will ever know why.

  Daniel Handler

  Knowing, Doubt, Happens

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• You might be afraid of the dark, but the dark is not afraid of you. That’s why the dark is always close by.

  Daniel Handler

  Dark, Might, Not Afraid

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• If you have ever lost a loved one, then you know exactly how it feels. And if you have not, then you cannot possibly imagine it.

  Daniel Handler

  Bereavement, Imagine, Loved Ones

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• I don't know why wicked places generally look wicked. You'd think they'd look nice, to fool people, but they hardly ever do.

  Daniel Handler

  Nice, Thinking, People

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• Tears are curious things, for like earthquakes or puppet shows, they can occur at any time, without any warning and without any good reason.

  Daniel Handler

  Earthquakes, Tears, Warning

  "The Wide Window". Book by Daniel Handler, www.mtv.com. February 25, 2000.

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