I am already so popular that anyone who vilifies me becomes more popular than I am.
The real truths are those that can be invented.
The psychoanalysts pick our dreams as if they were our pockets.
Scandal begins when the police put a stop to it.
I am not for women but against men.
I have decided many a stylistic problem first by my head, then by heads or tails.
Heinrich Heine so loosened the corsets of the German language that today every little salesman can fondle her breasts.
Blushing, palpitations, a bad conscience--this is what you get if you haven't sinned.
Culture is the tacit agreement to let the means of subsistence disappear behind the purpose of existence.
Hate must make a man productive. Otherwise one might as well love.
How powerful social mores are! Only a spider's web lies across the volcano, yet it refrains from erupting.
I like to hold a monologue with women. But a dialogue with myself is more stimulating.
Experiences are savings which a miser puts aside. Wisdom is an inheritance which a wastrel cannot exhaust.
It is a mystery to me how a theologian can be praised for having brought himself to disbelieve dogmas. I've always thought that those who have brought themselves to believe in dogmas merit the true recognition owing a heroic deed.
Children today laugh at fathers who tell them about dragons. It is necessary to make fear a required subject; otherwise children will never learn it.
When I take up my pen, nothing can happen to me. Fate, remember that.
Why didn't Eternity have this deformed age aborted ? Its birthmark is the stamp of a newspaper, its medium is printer's ink, and in its veins flows ink.
Mankind became hysterical in the Middle Ages because it poorly repressed the sexual impressions of its Greek boyhood.
To be perfect, one lacks only a defect.
An artist should make concessions to the listener. That is why Bruckner dedicated one of his symphonies to the Good Lord.
A journalist is stimulated by a deadline. He writes worse when he has time
"A cigar," said the altruist, "a cigar, my good man, I cannot give you. But any time you need a light, just come around; mine is always lit."
Squeeze human nature into the straitjacket of criminal justice and crime will appear.
Through my satire I make little people so big that afterwards they are worthy objects of my satire and no one can reproach me any longer.
What do people have against convicts? Is living together in the pen of freedom, where young people engage in mutual psychology, any more beautiful?
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