People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.
There has been a lot of progress during my lifetime, but I'm afraid it's heading in the wrong direction.
I think that I shall never see A billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I'll never see a tree at all.
If some confectioners were willing To let the shape announce the filling, We'd encounter fewer assorted chocs, Bitten into and returned to the box.
I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance, were it not for making living, which is rather a nouciance.
Time is like the ocean, always there, always different.
When grandparents enter the door, discipline flies out the window.
Abracadabra, thus we learn The more you create, the less you earn. The less you earn, the more you're given, The less you lead, the more you're driven, The more destroyed, the more they feed, The more you pay, the more they need, The more you earn, the less you keep, And now I lay me down to sleep. I pray the Lord my soul to take If the tax-collector hasn't got it before I wake.
Tonight's December thirty-first, something is about to burst. The clock is crouching, dark and small, like a time bomb in the hall. Hark, it's midnight, children dear. Duck! Here comes another year!
How confusing the beams from memory's lamp are; One day a bachelor, the next a grampa. What is the secret of the trick? How did I get so old so quick?
There was a young man of Herne Bay who was making some fireworks one day: but he dropped his cigar in the gunpowder jar. There was a young man of Herne Bay.
Senescence begins And middle-age ends The day your descendants Outnumber your friends
The cow is of the bovine ilk: One end is moo, the other, milk.
The camel has a single hump, The dromedary, two; Or else the other way around; I'm never sure. Are you?
If called by a panther, don't anther.
Progress might have been all right once, but it's gone on too long.
Time is so old and love so brief, love is pure gold and time a thief. We're late, darling, we're late, The curtain descends, everything ends, too soon, too soon.
All husbands are alike, but they have different faces so you can tell them apart.
Some debts are fun while you are acquiring them, But none are fun when you set about retiring them.
To love is an active verb.
Winter is the king of showmen, Turning tree stumps into snowmen And houses into birthday cakes And spreading sugar over lakes. Smooth and clean and frosty white, The world looks good enough to bite. That’s the season to be young, Catching snowflakes on your tongue. Snow is snowy when it’s snowing, I’m sorry it’s slushy when it’s going.
A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
Indoors or out, no one relaxes In March, that month of wind and taxes, The wind will presently disappear, The taxes last us all the year.
Celery, raw, Develops the jaw
I'd rather be a great bad poet than a good bad poet.
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