Jonah Quotes

• If the Bible had said that Jonah swallowed the whale, I would believe it.

  William Jennings Bryan

  Bible, Believe, Whales

  55 Copy quote

• We think that we do well to be angry with the rebellious, and so we prove ourselves to be more like Jonah than Jesus.

  Charles Spurgeon

  Jesus, Thinking, Rebellious

  Charles Spurgeon (2009). “Essential Works of Charles Spurgeon”, p.174, Barbour Publishing

  8 Copy quote

  Show source

• Adam hid in the Garden of Eden. Moses tried to substitute his brother. Jonah jumped a boat and was swallowed by a whale...Man likes to run from God. It's a tradition.

  Mitch Albom

  Running, Brother, Men

  Mitch Albom (2009). “Have a Little Faith: A True Story”, Hyperion

  7 Copy quote

  Show source

• It is pretty clear in the Bible story that the whale swallowing Jonah wasn't meant as a punishment from God, it was God saving him from drowning. So it was actually provision to give him a second chance. The whale itself was the start of Jonah's second chance.

  Phil Vischer

  Second Chance, Whales, Punishment

  "Behind the Scenes: Jonah and the Bible". "Jonah: A VeggieTales Movie", 2002.

  12 Copy quote

  Show source

• The farther we get from God, the more the world spirals out of control. My heart aches for America and its deceived people. The wonderful news is that our Lord is a God of mercy, and He responds to repentance. In Jonah's day, Nineveh was the lone world superpower-wealthy, unconcerned, and self-centered. When the Prophet Jonah finally traveled to Nineveh and proclaimed God's warning, people heard and repented. I believe the same thing can happen once again, this time in our nation. It's something I long for.

  Billy Graham

  Believe, Heart, Self

  15 Copy quote

• Like Jonah, you may lose your gourd, but you cannot lose your God.

  Charles Spurgeon

  Gourds, May, Loses

  Spurgeon, Charles H. “The Complete Works of C. H. Spurgeon, Volume 59: Sermons 3335-3386”, Delmarva Publications, Inc.

  13 Copy quote

  Show source

• Jonah saw God's will as punishment. Jesus saw God's will as nourishment.

  Warren W. Wiersbe

  Jesus, Punishment, Saws

  Warren W. Wiersbe (2005). “Bible Personalities: A Treasury of Insights for Personal Growth and Ministry”, p.71, Baker Books

  10 Copy quote

  Show source

• Lord, make me less like Jonah and more like Jesus. Save me from being the kind of person who cares more about my comfort, my reputation, and my success than I do about the people You are calling me to serve. Help me to keep all of my dreams on Your altar and be ready at all times to respond with faith and obedience to Your call.

  Colin S. Smith

  Dream, Jesus, People

  25 Copy quote

• When down in the mouth, remember Jonah. He came out all right.

  Thomas A. Edison

  Mouths, Remember

  7 Copy quote

• Some suffering is given in order to chastise and correct a person for wrongful patterns of life (as in the case of Jonah imperiled by the storm), some suffering is given not to correct past wrongs but to prevent future ones (as in the case of Joseph sold into slavery), and some suffering has no purpose other than to lead a person to love God more ardently for himself alone and so discover the ultimate peace and freedom.

  Timothy Keller

  God, Pain, Past

  Timothy Keller (2013). “Walking with God through Pain and Suffering”, p.40, Penguin

  30 Copy quote

  Show source

• Oh, are you from Wales? Do you know a fella named Jonah-He used to live in whales for a while

  Groucho Marx

  Inspiration, Whales, Used

  11 Copy quote

• In 'Surprised by Grace: God's Relentless Pursuit of Rebels,' I retell the story of Jonah and show how Jonah was just as much in need of God's grace as the sailors and the Ninevites.

  Tullian Tchividjian

  Grace, Rebel, Needs

  4 Copy quote

• The story of the whale swallowing Jonah, though a whale is large enough to do it, borders greatly on the marvelous; but it would have approached nearer to the idea of a miracle if Jonah had swallowed the whale.

  Thomas Paine

  Whales, Ideas, Miracle

  Thomas Paine (2016). “THE AGE OF REASON - Investigation of True and Fabulous Theology (Including “The Life of Thomas Paine”): Deistic Critique of Bible and Christian Church”, p.46, e-artnow

  9 Copy quote

  Show source

• I met Jonah Lomu. I never knew how huge he was. I felt like a peasant in a Godzilla movie. 'Quickly! Tell the other villagers! We go now!'

  Robin Williams

  Godzilla, Mets, Peasants

  8 Copy quote

• A large section of the idling classes of England get their incomes by believing that Jesus was born of a virgin and that Jonah swallowed a whale; and with the progress of science they were naturally finding this more and more difficult. A school of ingenious Bible-twisters arose, to invent symbolical and literary meanings for fairy tales, in order that people who no longer believed could continue with good conscience to collect the salaries of belief.

  Upton Sinclair

  Jesus, Believe, School

  8 Copy quote

• Amy gritted her teeth. "King Louis XVI even put Franklin's picture on a chamber pot!" Jonah looked at his dad. "Do we have souvenir chamber pots?" "No." His dad whipped out his phone. "I'll make the call.

  Rick Riordan

  Kings, Dad, Phones

  Rick Riordan (2016). “The 39 Clues 1: The 39 Clues: The Maze of Bones”, p.107, Scholastic UK

  4 Copy quote

  Show source

• If the bible myth of Jonah in the whale and the Mother Goose myth of Jack and the Beanstalk were switched at birth so that Jack in the Beanstalk were in the bible, do you think any child would notice?

  Bill Maher

  Mother, Children, Thinking

  9 Copy quote

• It is thought strange and particularly shocking by some persons for a woman to question the absolute correctness of the Bible. She is supposed to be able to go through this world with her eyes shut, and her mouth open wide enough to swallow Jonah and the Garden of Eden without making a wry face... Of all human beings a woman should spurn the Bible first.

  Helen H. Gardener

  Eye, Garden, Eden

  6 Copy quote

• Any real Bob Dylan fan would sleep with Jonah Lehrer.

  Bob Dylan

  Real, Sleep, Fans

  4 Copy quote

• If I wanted to see Jonah Hill masturbate at a pool party, I'd go to one of Jonah Hill's pool parties.

  Amy Poehler

  Party, Pool, Hills

  "29 Hilarious Jokes From Tina Fey & Amy Poehler During Their 3 Years As The Hosts Of The Golden Globes". Amy Poehler's speech as host at the 71st Golden Globe Awards, thoughtcatalog.com. January 12, 2014.

  5 Copy quote

  Show source

• Nobody got me out," Nellie replied. "They just let me go. They think I'm a deranged Jonah Wizard fan. Apparently, the hotel's full of them. A couple of idiots actually jumped off the front balcony. Can you picture that?" "In Technicolor," Amy said bitterly. "That low-down KGB reject!" Dan fumed. "I can't believe she cheated me–right when I was in the middle of cheating her!

  Gordon Korman

  Cheating, Couple, Believe

  12 Copy quote

• Television screens saturated with commercials promote the utopian and childish idea that all problems have fast, simple, and technological solutions. You must banish from your mind the naive but commonplace notion that commercials are about products. They are about products in the same sense that the story of Jonah is about the anatomy of whales.

  Neil Postman

  Simple, Ideas, Whales

  Neil Postman (2011). “Conscientious Objections: Stirring Up Trouble About Language, Technology and Education”, p.113, Vintage

  11 Copy quote

  Show source

• Seated upon the convex mound Of one vast kidney, Jonah prays And sings his canticles and hymns, Making the hollow vault resound God's goodness and mysterious ways, Till the great fish spouts music as he swims.

  Aldous Huxley

  Music, Hymns, Swim

  Aldous Huxley (1970). “Letters of Aldous Huxley”

  4 Copy quote

  Show source

• Between now and when we graduate next year there are at least ten weeks' holiday and five random public holidays. There's email and if you manage to get down to the town, there's text messaging and mobile phone calls. If not, the five minutes you get to speak to me on your communal phone is better than nothing. There are the chess nerds who want to invite you to our school for the chess comp next March and there's this town in the middle, planned by Walter Burley Griffin, where we can meet up and protest against our government's refusal to sign the Kyoto treaty." -Jonah Griggs

  Melina Marchetta

  School, Holiday, Kyoto

  5 Copy quote

• I feel like Jonah Hill would be a good selfie, or Jennifer Lawrence. They'd be really good ones...Historic.

  Sarah Hyland

  Would Be, Hills, Historic

  7 Copy quote