I always hated those classic kid movies like Old Yeller or The Yearling where the beloved pet dies. What would be so wrong with having those damn kids learn their lessons about mortality from watching Grandpa kick? Then at least the dog would be around to comfort them.
Posterity is the patriotic name for grandchildren.
I don't believe in happy endings. Children have got to face death sooner or later. Granny and Grandpa die, dogs die, cats die, gerbils and those frightful things - what are they called? - hamsters: all die like flies. So there's no point avoiding it.
You know, when I was nineteen, Grandpa took me on a roller coaster. Up, down, up, down. Oh, what a ride! I always wanted to go again. You know, it was just so interesting to me that a ride could make me so frightened, so scared, so sick, so excited, and so thrilled all together! Some didn't like it. They went on the merry-go-round. That just goes around. Nothing. I like the roller coaster. You get more out of it.
One-hundred-ten years of history, great diversity, lots of new earnings drivers and I just became a grandpa - twins. And I'm buying JJ, Pfizer and Warner for their future college funds.
The last two years, nationals have been close to home for me, so I've had big family support from friends and club support. Especially last year in Ottawa, I had a whole section my grandpa got for all my family, and the skating club (supported me). I feel like I'm a veteran at this now.
The principle of work is part of self-discipline. Now, my dear young sisters, I have lived a good many years longer than you, but even back in Grandpa's time there was something to make you want to lie down and go to sleep-they called it work.
I used to write things that might have sounded better coming out of an older person's voice or vision. Hence, "grandpa-boy." I'm an old man, but I'm a boy. A really old boy!
I wanted to be able to tell my grandkids one day, "Hey, your grandpa ran into a burning building and survived."
My grandpa taught me how to live off the land.
What an honor that Stephen Prouty got nominated for best makeup and hairstyling for Jackass Presents Bad Grandpa. Am I as stunned as everyone else we didn’t get the nod for best picture? Well of course, duh, but I won’t let that take away from my happiness for Steve, Tony Gardner, and our whole makeup team. Wahoo!
Just across the ocean in, say Kenya or Tanzania, a two-gender system is vital for the survival of most of the folks who live there. Men do men's work, women do women's work, and so it all gets done and the jackals can't get into the hut and eat grandpa. So, the future of the transgender movement is like the future of all human rights movements: whatever the state of things in your area now, with some work it all gets a little bit better all the time, even if it is sometimes three steps ahead and two steps back.
Grandchildren: the only people who can get more out of you than the IRS.
Becoming a grandmother is wonderful. One moment you're just a mother. The next you are all-wise and prehistoric.
On the seventh day God rested. His grandchildren must have been out of town.
Beautiful old people are works of art.
I'm from Milwaukee, Wisconsin. I moved to LA when I was about eleven years old. I always go back to Milwaukee whenever I can. Just chill with my grandpa and my grandmother and just be with family, be with people that were there before I got a million views on YouTube because of my music video.
My grandkids believe I'm the oldest thing in the world. And after two or three hours with them, I believe it, too.
I wish I had the energy that my grandchildren have - if only for self-defense.
I was always a person on my mother's hip in the kitchen. My mom really wanted her kids at her side as much as possible, and she worked in restaurants for over fifty years. And my grandfather had ten children, and he grew and prepared most of the food. My grandmother, on my mother's side, was the family seamstress and the baker. So my mom, the eldest child, was always in the kitchen with my grandpa and I was always in the production and restaurant kitchens and our own kitchen with my mom. And it's just something that has always spoken to me.
I was talking to my grandpa last Thanksgiving. He pulled me aside and was like, "This Thanksgiving is the 150th for the Vaughn family in Chicago." I was like, "Cool, whatever," but I think when you have a culture like that, you should have a real appreciation for it. My family's been there forever and I don't want to leave.
What if it turns out there really are witches and vampires and werewolves living right here alongside us? After all, what better disguise could there be than to get your image enshrined in the culture of the mass media? Anything that's described in artistic terms and shown in the movies stops being frightening and mysterious. For real horror you need the spoken word, you need an old grandpa sitting on a bench, scaring the grandkids in the evening.
All children need a laptop. Not a computer, but a human laptop. Moms, Dads, Grannies and Grandpas, Aunts, Uncles - someone to hold them, read to them, teach them. Loved ones who will embrace them and pass on the experience, rituals and knowledge of a hundred previous generations. Loved ones who will pass to the next generation their expectations of them, their hopes, and their dreams.
President Obama finally has his own personal Twitter account. Even John McCain said, 'Welcome to the Internet, grandpa.'
So George Burns and my grandpa took me to my first baseball game.
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